The Cute is BACK! HAHAHAHAHA!
POSTED ON: 12 August 2014 @ 12:09 AM | 0 comments
Hiii! (flowers for YOU!!!!) It had beeeennnn like soooo long since I penned down my thoughts and my life in this blog. "Welcome back" to me! Lappie spoilt for second time too. Hence, the delay! :) There were many changes in life ---- not really dramatic though. HAHAHA!
1. I am officially a car driver.
Yeah, you heard me. I have a car! *Praise the Lord*. But I am really in an initial stage of driving that my student who I was fetching was frightened when I fetched him back home. However, I have to say... prayers are really needed for someone like me. So, it is a good platform to really place my trust in Lord and a patience-learning platform.
2. I quit my job.
I know. I know! Surprisingly, I did! Now I am on my way to be a relief teacher in government public school. To support myself in this unemployed season, I have some freelance tuition with a couple of students. So yeah, I can't spend much but I just need to spend wisely.
3. I want to be involved in church.
Enough of excuses of not doing this or doing that. I think it is not matter of time (because I thought of not staying put in Melaka for long), it is matter of willingness. I also believe in this season of 'not-wanting-to-involve-in-anything', I learnt human can come up with any excuses for things they not want to do. And when we do that, we are really making decisions ourselves without putting Lord into our decisions. I do believe that involvement of church is important in a Christian's life. Not so much of displaying you are a Christian, but as an act of obedience to the Lord and a testimony for other Christians to follow.
4. I AM GOING TO BE BAPTISED!
I saved the best for the last. So, there you go! I will be baptised and I am very excited. Nine years and at last! I was asked the meaning of baptism by a brother in church. I told him it was 'Dying of old self , burial of sin and rising as a new self with Christ ; Not as slave of sin but slave of righteousness'. Yeah, it is correct. But when he told me it is also UNION / ONENESS with God, I thought for a while. I mean I really thought for a while. I was thinking 'Why would God want to be ONE with a sinner like me?'. I know it is because of love. But it is just that I cannot comprehend the MASSIVENESS of his love for me.Like WOW!I am thankful I am loved. :')
THAT'S ALL for now! I am reading ' In The Grip of Grace' by Max Lucado (which took me months! Come on Fong Wan!!) and I wanna share this:
"You are saved, not because what you do but because of what Christ did. And you are special, not because of what you do , but because of whose you are . And you are HIS. And because we are His, let's forget the shortcuts and stay on the main road. He knows the way. He drew the map. He knows the way home."
Labels: adventure, blessed, firm, Jesus, personal, update
Planned-out Plans!
POSTED ON: 04 April 2014 @ 11:30 AM | 0 comments
Been planning out life, but nothing goes according to what I planned. I guess I am frustrated and disappointed. Not once but a few. But but but, I learnt lessons through this season.1) I always want to be god of my life.
I love planning and want things my ways. Rather than just submitting it to God, I choose to plan my life and how I should live, forgetting this life is supposed to be a worship unto the Lord. Well, I am kinda like making my life a worship for myself. So much of self-fulfillment , isn't it? Totally forgotten, that I was already dead but made alive in Christ, supposingly my new life is a platform/tool/ agent/ ambassador ( u name it) of Christ.
2. Don't always ask God for a YES as answer rather asking God for His will.
One thing about the selfish me is that I always want God to answer my prayers. Like 'I wanna do this', 'Give me this', 'Grant me this' and 'Help me with this' rather than, 'O'Lord, answer my prayer according to Your will, that no matter answers You give, I will accept it knowing You are a sovereign God.' I also realised I always prepare myself for the good result but not the bad result. So I have learnt I need to always prepare for a NO answer knowing that my God is GOOD.
3. My God really really really sees things in bigger picture. (like way bigger and awesomer)
I see my future with my eyes and want it the way I think it is good. But I believe that God have better and way awesome plans for me if only I am willing to submit in His ways. Like seriously. I just have to trust that He is going to use me greatly, no matter how blurry is the road in front of me. I just gotta trust in my Dad. 'Give me life in Thy ways' ... I learned that in camp and I am so going to practice it. :)
Last but not least, I was watching this movie 'The Tree of Life' and there was this quote in the movie which left quite an impact on me.
The nuns taught us there are two ways through life … the way of Nature… and the way of Grace. You have to choose which one you'll follow. Grace doesn't try to please itself. Accepts being slighted, forgotten, disliked. Accepts insults and injuries. Nature only wants to please itself. Get others to please it too. Likes to lord it over them. To have its own way. It finds reasons to be unhappy... when all the world is shining around it... when love is smiling through all things.
(2 Corinthians 5 :14-15) For Christ’s love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died. And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for Him who died for them and was raised again.
Labels: adventure, blessed, Jesus, journey, life, personal
Letter from Myself.
POSTED ON: 13 January 2014 @ 8:26 PM | 0 comments
Received a letter from myself that I wrote months ago.And I read this sentence,
"Your life is not about leaving your legacy but leaving HIS legacy so that people will come to know that He is the only way, truth and life."
Thank you for the reminder, O'Lord.
Labels: adventure, blessed, Jesus, journey
Few more days.
POSTED ON: 23 December 2013 @ 2:20 PM | 0 comments
8 more days
to the last day of 2013. Wow! Time really really really flies.
Looked around, many changes had took place. I
have a work. I am officially a teacher. I am a graduate. I started to learn to
be more responsible in my life. No more doing whatever I like just because I
like it. *shouting ‘I AM A GROWN-UP*. Haha. Finally, (like FINALLLYYY!!) I understand that every decision comes
with its consequence. Some friends are in oversea, some friends are heading abroad,
some friends are graduating, some friends are pursuing Master degree and some
friends are still studying.
Looking
back and reflecting the year of 2013, I think many and many ( like really MANNNNY) things had taken place.
I had my last semester in university, quitted Jazz Band, prepared my heart to
leave, reluctant to leave, went to Camp Cameron, went to be a teacher in an
International School, pulled my hair because of students, had an awesome convocation with family and friends, went
through a phase of adapting at home after three years, found a church to be
called a home-church, went back to university as a graduate and many many many
smiles, tears, memories and friendships in between.
I would
regard this year as the BEST YEAR so far not because many things had took place
but because I know I can never face all these seasons mentioned without my only
and one understanding and faithful Dad. So many changes and yet I am still
standing still, I am amazed how everything fall into place at the end of the
day.
I guess I
am really an adult at last. *pull my hair and shout NOOOOO*
P/S: As we
prepare our heart for Christmas and New Year, lets us reflect our year with
thankfulness and gratefulness that we are still alive and safe. May you walk
into the new year with the mind that He will always hold your hand as you face
a new year of adventures. May you grow
in Word and to grasp His unfailing love for you.
Merry
Christmas and Blessed NEW YEAR 2014 (*eyes open wide..like I am going to be 24 already??! haha)
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Labels: adventure, beautiful, blessed, happy, journey, life, newseason, newyear
Same!
POSTED ON: 16 October 2013 @ 9:32 AM | 0 comments
Different chapter but SAME, CONSTANT GOD!
Labels: adventure, beautiful, blessed, faith, God, happy, thought
Thank you. :)
POSTED ON: 27 June 2013 @ 11:06 PM | 0 comments
''Packing is a little bit different this time; I am packing memories as well.''
I know this day will arrive. This day where this university life will come to an end. I still remember my mother sent me to this island and I cried when she went back alone and was grateful she made a trip here. I cried to her telling her that I have no friend. I cried because I was alone. How time flies.
Today, I know if I cry...I cry of joy because my God supplies all the needs that He knows I need in this university---- He gave me everything that made this university chapter such a worthwhile chapter. How I have grown towards Him, how I have grown to love people around me...this things I will never never never see myself as, three years ago. Marvellous things He did and transformed in me.
I know the road ahead could be a little bit stormy and windy. I know with all the doubts and uncertainties I may fall but I choose to live with Him and for Him. I believe that everything that I've learnt here , it will be enough for me to move forward for the next chapter. A friend of mine wrote this to me, 'I will let you go because I know God has in-stored so much more for you, for your journey ahead.'
There you go, I am leaving this place with the heart of gratefulness and joy because of my God who is ever faithful and my friends that never stop encouraging and draw me close to our God each day. :) I know that even in times of trouble in the future, I will look back, looking at this chapter and reminisce the works and love my Father had done and shown through the people around me and will preserve and finish strong with my eyes set upon Him and continue establishing His kingdom with actions of love.
With this, see you again people! It's never goodbye! Thank you so much for even in every little things you have done.
Your love, LORD, reaches to the heavens, your faithfulness to the skies.
(Psalm 36:5)
Labels: adventure, beautiful, blessed. graduation, friendship, God, kawan sejati, university
Cheerios.
POSTED ON: 17 May 2013 @ 3:45 AM | 0 comments
This post is for this girl, PHANG CARMEN. Why? Because I always wanted to write about her. Yeah, and because today I was reflective about my university journey and this girl is a must-for-me to write because I really sayang her.
I remembered seeing her in NC. That time everyone said to me ,' You should know Carmen lah'. I am like ,' Who is this girl?. Last week as I was talking to her , she said that I am her one of good friends. I am like so honoured. This girl is President for our university CF. Why would she consider me as her good friend? HAHA.
Turned out, the feeling is mutual. Turned out, she is one of the best things that happened to me in university. I always that God placed her in my life to equip me with His love and His wisdom. This girl always look at things so differently that I can learn from her. This girl always so fired up for God. This girl always always lend her helping hands when I have no one to turn to. She always says to me , 'Fong Wan, you know you always come to me when you don't have enough money.' :') God knows what I need in life, it is not about money. It is about reassurance He will provide.
Today I just want to tell her this:
Dear Phang Carmen,
I am really thankful for you. Yes, you! I know you might hear this many times, but I really think I sayang you. Thank you for everything you have done. Always so welcoming. Always so accepting. Like a family , I can rely when I have no one to turn to. I am really grateful for your presence in my life. Thank you for showing me Christ's love towards people. Thank you for living God's way. Thank you for just being there for me caring for me as I go somewhere. Thank you for teaching me lessons . Thank you for regarding me as your good friends. I may not be that good but in your eyes, you always see the best in me. So many things great things about you, but thank you so so much for choosing to LOVE me despite everything. :') WE will definitely cheer one another up to keep our eyes on Him and run the race with endurance, okay? Let finish the race and demonstrate of His love to family and the ones we care okay? Let's be friend forever until we go heaven okay? And we shall dance with joy with Him in His kingdom. :')
1st Year
First meet in National Conference (N.C)
2nd Year
3rd Year
MUAHHHHHHHH!!!! *Love love love*
Labels: adventure, beautiful, blessed. graduation, faithfulness, friendship, God, journey, kawan sejati, life, love, person, university
Escape!!!
POSTED ON: 13 April 2013 @ 7:11 PM | 0 comments
*Yays*. I went to Escape. *pat myself*. It is a theme park consist of monkey business with three levels of adventurous obstacles that you have to overcome and many more other activities. Monkey business ranged from the easiest (Level 1) to the most diffcult (Level 3). So, it was a sunny Friday morning that I've decided to go with my chemistry friends, right after coming back from graduating Langkawi trip with Steph and Aud.
And so, I am writing not to brag about how well I did with Escape, about how brave was I..how it was so enjoyable accomplishing all three levels.I am here to to tell you I was really scared overcoming those obstacles even though I know I was protected by the chain-like used for flying
fox.
fox.
The protection chain.
Especially during the first level. It is like I couldn't trust the capability of the protection, how it will always catches me even if i fall. So I was struggling believing how safe I was, at first level. I think in life, sometimes even though we know God is there to protect us , to bring us through it , we struggle believing that He will. Life with God in Christianity is not one way relationship. You have the privilege to say 'Yes' or ' No'. As much as God is always there to give us His best, are u willing to just trust in Him, with faith to just GO for it?
When I was up there wanting to jump down, I was shouting inside my heart ' God help me, please God.' When I finished it, I was like, 'Yays, that was not as hard as I thought'. It's so true especially when we face with obstacles in life itself..sometimes all it takes it just a decision to just go for it, listen to what God says. He said He will be with you. So, just enjoy the ride.
I had the worst experience but the most worthwhile ones when I did the third level of monkey business. At first I was so pumped and I was quick to finish one of the third level. ( there are three routes in three levels). I didn't even rest and I headed for the MOST DIFFICULT monkey business. and guess what, I was STUCK twice. I guess I should have rest at first. But I was so excited that I forgot 'rest'. Rest and reflect in life is important as well. When God created the world, the seventh day was for rest. So, I think I have to learn to rest in life and not so much of being so excited to do works for God and forgot to spend time with Him.
When I was stuck twice, I was really tired. My physical body told me, 'You cannot do it, Fong Wan.' My brain tells me, 'You can. You are born to do this.' And I was really really really tired. Twice, I asked for RESCUE and twice I managed to get up just before they came to rescue me. At first, I told them..'No, don't rescue me. I wanna do this myself.' By as time goes by, I tend to give up more easily. It is true that in life as we walk for so long, we give up what we desire initially. We were not brave as how we used to be. Maybe because the journey of life itself is windy and long. Sometimes disappointments of getting up itself requires too much strength, and it is okay just to stay 'stuck' because it is easier that way. But you know you can get up, it is whether you want it or not. If God had prepared you for this challenge, believe me when I say, He will bring you out of it.
Spot me? Was sitting on the rope!
'Stuck'
The first 'stuck'
One more, friend's encouragements are stronger than you think. The way they gives you a thumb up when you finish the race, the way they say, 'You can do it! One more!' , how they scold you when you gives up half-way..I hope to be that friend for my friends. :)
Friends that encourage.
When I was hanging up there too, there was this UK little boy asked me ' Are you okay? Do you need help?' , I said, 'No, I am okay here.' .He responded, ' Do you know you will die if they don't rescue you?'. I said, ' Never mind. I have God.' . HAHAHA. What a respond?'
So, that was some bit of lessons I learned from Escape Theme Park. Good experience. Good companion. Safe and sound. Reminded me so much of God, which I didn't know why. Gonna apply this in my life,
'Never mind, I have God'. :)
Labels: adventure, bless, friendship, God, holiday, journey, random, university
