A ROAD WITH HIM HOLDING

''By a roadside in the wilderness,He'll lead me and rivers in the desert will I see...''

Archives Entries


When Life is Not the Way It Seems to Be.

POSTED ON: 26 January 2014 @ 3:30 PM | 0 comments

Because life is not the way I wanted,
Because I am lost,
Because I feel like a loser,
I went away.

I went away,
Finding my own strength,
Seeking my own directions,
Trusting in my own choices.

Trusting myself,
Trusting everything else,
Except the One who created me,
The One who loved and is still loving me.

The One who whispered,
'Come to me',
'Come, don't harden your heart.'
'Come to me, my precious.'

'Come!'
But, time and time again,
I trusted myself,
I went away,
Because life is not the way I wanted.


And I stopped. 		Because life is not the way I wanted,
Because I am lost,
Because I feel like a loser,
I come again.

I come again,
Finding Your strength,
Seeking Your will,
Trusting in You.

Trusting in You,
And not everything else,
Only You, the One who created me,
The One who loved and is still loving me.

The One who never stop loving,
Waiting, correcting
Molding, rebuking,
I am indeed Your precious.

Because I am Your Precious,
This time, 
Trusting in You,
I come again
Because I would never even found a LIFE without You.

And I come.



Labels: family, God, journey, life, personal, tough


Back.

POSTED ON: 05 November 2013 @ 9:32 PM | 0 comments

Guess where did I come back from???? I just came back from Universiti Malaya's Persaudaraan Kristian Varsiti camp! 

 I know it was really weird that I joined a camp not being a student there but I believe God works in very unique way.

 Clement asked, ' What makes you join our camp?'
I replied, ' I guess God has to pull me back to where I grow the most (university) to retell me that He is the author and perfecter of faith. That He will know how I feel and that I don't have to run away from Him. 

**(Not exactly the exact things I said to Clem, there are rephrasing)

It is good to take a break from all of the things that hinder me from getting to a greater height with God. Now I am refreshed, it is time to minister and serve in where I am now with all my heart to the Lord,

Because I am reminded...

1st Corinthians 15: 8
Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.

Labels: camp, God, journey, life, refresh


Letter from Patrick!

POSTED ON: @ 9:02 PM | 0 comments

Just when things got a little bit silent and I received this!


I am always amazed by how people can think of us once in a blue moon. I am really happy that I was thought of. And I am glad I was 'RUNNING' in their mind. Haha!

Tien Hui, 
Thank you so much for you timely note. Thank you for noticing it. Thank you for being there. Three years had passed but I can still feel the love and care. I am so grateful for you and this note. Thank you for wanting to pray for me! Allow me to do the same to you! :)

MISS YOU A BUNCH PATRICK!!!!! And u are forever a Patrick for me. I think that suits you more than Miss Brilliant?! Haha!! Coz Patrick is a loyal friend! :)

I really pray that YOU will finish this chapter of yours looking unto HIM and impacting  lives that will go long long ways! But first and foremost, ENJOY!!! weeeee!!!! 

Labels: friendship, God, good, timely, university


Same!

POSTED ON: 16 October 2013 @ 9:32 AM | 0 comments

Different chapter but SAME, CONSTANT GOD!





Labels: adventure, beautiful, blessed, faith, God, happy, thought


Work.

POSTED ON: 09 October 2013 @ 8:29 PM | 1 comments

''Work''

Sometimes, I stopped and think..'Is this what you want to do for the rest of your life...work?' ; 'Do you find pleasure in working?'I can answer a definite 'NO!' for the first question and clueless about the second answer! Sometimes I struggled with 'Is this what you really want to do?'I don't know how people can make it. How older workers work the whole time in their life and manage their time. I am so much younger and sometimes I am just so exhausted. 

I think I just want to find meanings in the things I do in my life. I know the source of the meaning is God. And I know the road of being a teacher itself is not easy. So much to learn to be a dedicated teacher .

'One step at a time.'

Also, it had been a little hard to keep in touch with friends but please note that you all are always in my hearts. You don't know how many times I read those letters/notes you gave. You don't know how many times I scrolled Facebook pictures to see us. 

But, I just gotta move on. Told myself I needed six month..so it's till March to be in some 'dreamy' moods. I also find that life is not stagnant. Meeting new people and moving to another place are always parts of life that constantly reminds us to live to the fullest in our present and do our best for the Lord and the people around us in that point of our lives.


And no matter, I still got Jesus with me. :)

Labels: blessed, God, personal, thoughts


I want to teach...

POSTED ON: 28 September 2013 @ 9:46 PM | 1 comments



I want to teach...

Not because it is the easiest job,
Not because I want to earn easy bucks,
Not because 'Those that cannot make it, they teach.'
Not because I can shout at students,
And feel powerful when they listen to me.

I want to teach...

Because I want to make differences in my students,
Emotionally and physically,
Because I want to tell them , 'You can do it!'
Because I want to believe that each one of them can be molded,
And gives hopes when things seems hopeless.

I want to teach...

Not because teaching is fun,
It is not because sometimes it can wear me down,
Emotionally and physically,
But because these children,
They are teaching me lessons too,
And believe that God is teaching me through them.

And because of all these,  I will continue to learn and teach.





Labels: God, personal, school, teach, thought


EVERYTHING I ever needed.

POSTED ON: 15 September 2013 @ 9:53 PM | 0 comments

I've had many tears and sorrows,
I've had questions for tomorrow,
there's been times I didn't know right from wrong.
But in every situation,
God gave me blessed consulation,
that my trials come to only make me strong.

I've been to lots of places,
I've seen a lot of faces,
there's been times I felt so all alone.
But in my lonely hours,
yes, those precious lonely hours,
Jesus lets me know that I was His own

I thank God for the mountains,
and I thank Him for the valleys,
I thank Him for the storms He brought me through.
For if I'd never had a problem,
I wouldn't know God could solve them,
I'd never know what faith in God could do

Through it all,
through it all,
I've learned to trust in Jesus,
I've learned to trust in God.

Through it all,
through it all,
I've learned to depend upon His Word.

Who am I that He wants to stay beside me when I cry? Who am I that He is willing to hear the complains that I made? Who am I that He decided to love? Who am I that He willing to wash my ugliness with His Beauty and Blood? Who am I that He cares ? Who am I ?

And yet, He chose to clothe me with everything that I needed ; EVERYTHING I ever needed.








Labels: beautiful, bless, blessed, Daddy, God


Giver.

POSTED ON: 11 September 2013 @ 11:27 PM | 0 comments

As I was praying with the sisters in church, I was really convicted by this word, 'Giver'. I think I am blinded by the money that I am earning. I think that the salary I am earning , it is not enough. Therefore, I am giving tuition to students from my school. I was given two students. And I wanted more. I think 'money' eventually blinded me in the process of having more. And  with the assumed sum of money that I am going to earn, I started to plan what I want to achieve in this one year. I can tell you the plans that I have, it is so self-oriented. For example, going to New Zealand for work and travel.

 I did not ask God about this. I just decided that I wanna save up for it. Because I just want to do it. And now I have two students that I am going to give tuition to and it gonna take up Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. And I am already foresee weariness. Somehow promise is a promise. 

  I ask myself sometimes, 'Why are you doing this, Fong Wan?Why?' I can tell you honestly that I am doing all of these not for family, not for people around me... but for me. Then today, I realised I became selfish! So selfish and so self-oriented , I forgot and lost my identity as a daughter of Christ that gives. And I couldn't recognise the giver I used to be.

 But today I am reminded again the ultimate reason I came back to this place is to give, to minister to my mother, brother, sister and people around me. And also to see God and witness His goodness in times of difficulties. In camp, I drew God was walking with me along the hills, up and down. Now I understand why I drew that. Because life is not easy but God promised He would walk with me.

 I don't want to give out of convenience but I wanna be a greater giver that give in times of inconvenience because that would mean so much more, with Him and for Him.
Because my Jesus gave and still giving, I am giving too! 



Labels: beautiful, family, God, home, personal


Doing what you do.

POSTED ON: 01 September 2013 @ 8:54 PM | 0 comments

What is your passion?

What are the things you believe in?

Go all out and live for the passion and everything you believe in.Because these two things are going to push you whenever you feel like a failure. There are reasons why you are living the way you living. Believe me when I said, ' You are what you made because of your choices.'. For me , it's...

Jesus.
Grace, Love, Mercy.

Labels: God, random, thoughts


A Job!

POSTED ON: 30 August 2013 @ 11:00 PM | 0 comments

Found a job!! It is a teaching post! I am going to teach primary students. I am happy!! I know that I am going to get this job actually because I believe God will provide. 

 Nevertheless, I talked to my mother about the amount of money I have to give to her monthly. When she told me about the amount, I told her that I cannot give that much because I just couldn't. But I know that deep inside my heart, I put myself above my family. I know I was being selfish. 

 I was talking to an auntie in the church, she told me that I have to give my mother no matter what because we have to honour our parents. It strikes me how I always put myself first rather that God (as to not follow His ways by honouring parents)and also family. I also came across this picture in Facebook quoting, 'Sometimes you think your parents couldn't give you the things you want but no knowing they gave you everything they have.' 

 So many times, I really envy of others who can do whatever they want but never did I thought that my mother gave everything she can have in her life to give me a better life. All I do is compare and blame. I must have disappointed her with my selfish thinking and actions. But I am also grateful that I know this right now. 

 Even with the money that I am earning now, it can never be enough but I would love to use it to glorify God and exhibit God's love towards my family. If I cannot part with the money I am earning, I don't think I can be a good testimony to my family. As I was struggling with this too, a thought came to me when I was talking to my mother...'She is aged, she might go one day...the money you are earning.. give her WHILE YOU CAN.'

 I , myself experienced first-hand the pain and regret of losing the love one. I am not going to feel the same for the thing that I can do but not. And I am just going to really really really depend on God..on Him..for this season. Because He knows and understands. :')

1st John 3 :16-18 This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters.If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person? Dear children,let us not love with words or speech but with ACTIONS and in TRUTH.



Labels: family, God, home, learnt, lesson, life, melaka, quote


Because of Ah Phang!

POSTED ON: 04 August 2013 @ 5:36 PM | 0 comments

It is Sunday again. But today, PKA's new batch Excos are here to do Committee Retreat Planning (CPR). It always really really nice to see these faces of darlings in the church. But even with that short meet-up, I am already so delighted but also with a little bit swollen heart inside of me.

Then, I also received this gift from a friend of mine in Penang. I cried. Why? Because when I read the card, I am feeling exactly what she is feeling. I miss her . I miss people whom I 'sayang' in USM. I think when I came back to this home of mine, I came back with 'compare mindset' Even with family, I was thinking, 'My friends in Penang would do this, why can't them?'

I cannot deny it will take a little bit more time to let go of the previous chapter that God had blessed me with. I am gonna miss the people that I used to be with so much.So so much. Sometimes my tears fell itself when I thought of it, without realising. But I am not going to allow all of these to hinder His works in my life in Melaka. I am gonna embrace these emotions but will work together hand-in-hand with grace with my Father.

It will take time but My Father is here with me. :') 

Dear Ah Phang, I miss you. :') You know I actually cried when I read that. Thank you for your continuous encouragement and love even though we are far apart. Never knew why I deserve a friend like you till now. I will always bring Donkey wherever I go to remember God's goodness in my life because He gave me friend like you. I may not see you that often anymore which actually secretly sadden me, but I will try my best okay? I really cant wait to see you again in September. Arr, I am tearing again. But you know how much you meant to me. Even though we are far apart , but you are always CLOSE to my heart. Distance is not a problem when we have the heart , love and effort. :) Me sayang YOU a lot. :')

Helllow Donkey P!!


Thank you Ah Phang!







These are my reactions when I got the Donkey!

This is for YOU, AH PHANG!
Spongebob Drawing FOR YOU!

And once again, I am thankful for all the things You have done, my Lord.


Before the world began
You were on His mind
And every tear you cry
Is precious in His eyes
Because of His great love
He gave His only Son
Everything was done
So you would come

Nothing you can do
Could make Him love you more
And nothing that you've done
Could make Him close the door
Because of His great love
He gave His only Son
Everything was done
So you would come

Come to the Father
Though your gift is small
Broken hearts, broken lives
He will take them all
The power of the Word
The power of His blood
Everything was done
So you would come

I will never understand how wide, deep and great is Your love for me. But I am thankful for everything EVERYTHING You have done for me in the past, the blessings You poured unto me, My Lord.. Because of what You did, I am able to stand before you and have a personal relationship with you. Thank you for taking in all unpleasing character of mine and wanting to mold me even though I am unworthy. Thank you for loving me, for a wretch like me. Thank you for dying for me. :')






Labels: bestfriend, blessed, friendship, God, journey, love, personal, sister


I am Home.

POSTED ON: 28 July 2013 @ 7:39 PM | 1 comments

It had been a week since I came back from Cameron Camp. When people asked me whether I have this post-cameron-camp-syndrome, I told them, 'Yeahhh..but I am also having more of this post-graduation-from-USM-syndrome'. Honestly, I miss everything about PENANG, USM and everyone who is going to be there in September. Sometimes , I wish September would come a little bit faster so that I can see familiar faces again. Because of that, I did not feel that I am home.

 I know the ministry at home is not going to be easy. But I love what Mother Teresa said that 'We can do no great things only small things with great love.' It reminded me on how little things that were done out of love that really matter to God than doing big great things out of own desires. Maybe just washing plates, sweeping floor, listening to sister, listening to brother, accompanying my mother to watch television...just being there to help as much as I can... in little things,out of love that matters.

 It was hard at first when I came back especially the first few days in Melaka. I wanted to run, to go to somewhere where I can do what I want, to have the freedom to be who I want to be..but I know deep inside of me, I was being very selfish just by thinking of that. How can I leave my family behind and not be there for them after what I've learnt of Him in the past three years? How can I know God by myself and not share Him and demonstrate Him with my loves one?

 My family needs love, not the normal love...but my Father's perfect love. And I know...I know now God is here with me..in this family of mine. Yes, right now, this house! God loves this family too. And I know it is not going to be easy. But I am not giving up. I am not giving up serving this family because I know God is not giving up as well. 

 So finally after some days of re-adapting here, I just want to say..'I am home.' And I am glad I am home.I know this journey can be a little bit shaky ahead, but I will stand firm with Christ as the foundation. Because God so loved my mother, brother and sister too that He ALSO gave up His only begotten son to die for them. With that, I will try my best but also reminded to let God to do the rest. So yeah... I am home, people!
1st Corinthians 15:58 : Therefore my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labour in the Lord is not in vain.

1st Corinthians 16: 13-14: Be on your guard, stand firm in faith, be men of courage; be strong. Do everything in love.

Labels: blessed, family, Father's love, firm, God, home, thoughts


Give me Life in Thy Ways.

POSTED ON: 23 July 2013 @ 3:09 PM | 1 comments

I am back from Cameron Camp 2013. Couldn't believe that I endured three weeks of cold weather. It was really really really a good experience to deal with obstacles in life. I came in to Cameron Camp , wanted to be equipped with God's Word. But well, I guess Daddy got another plan for me. He wanted to me to be ME!

 Weird huh? I guess when I accepted Jesus Christ as my saviour..I forgot that He wanted to love me for who I am. Never did I know that all He want is to ACCEPT ME for who I really am. All I look forward is to please Him with the best that I can and neglecting my weaknesses and do not embrace the fact that I am FONG WAN, the one who also know life hurts.

 Because of the obstacles of life which made me stronger but it also resulted me to ignore things that allow me to appear 'weak' to others. Because of that, I never wanted to share during my first week in camp. But I learnt to share to the Lord whom love me for who I am even though it was really difficult. Because I know deep inside of me, it was worth it.

 After attending camp, indeed one of the crucial answers were answered. I remembered asking God, 'I am willing to give up everything for you, even to go to the end of earth for you...why are you not sending me?' But now I know it is because I never know how to be a daughter to serve Him, but rather a servant that want to serve Him with all my strengths forgetting to embrace my weaknesses too.

 And that was the most important thing I have learnt in Cameron Camp. I know in me, I am not strong enough to endure this life with so many obstacles that going to tear me down, but I am going to stand firm in  my Daddy who is going to cry, walk , smile, sit and comfort me whenever I know I cannot do it.

 Funny how God always have another way to awaken you from your mistakes. But well, He is after-all the Creator and knew me while I was in mommy's womb...Thank you, Dad! Thank you for wanting to love me and showing me grace despite knowing I will fail you. :'))))))











Labels: blessed, cameron, camp, Daddy, God, personal


Thank you. :)

POSTED ON: 27 June 2013 @ 11:06 PM | 0 comments

''Packing is a little bit different this time; I am packing memories as well.''

I know this day will arrive. This day where this university life will come to an end. I still remember my mother sent me to this island and I cried when she went back alone and was grateful she made a trip here. I cried to her telling her that I have no friend. I cried because I was alone. How time flies.

Today, I know if I cry...I cry of joy because my God supplies all the needs that He knows I need in this university---- He gave me everything that made this university chapter such a worthwhile chapter. How I have grown towards Him, how I have grown to love people around me...this things I will never never never see myself as, three years ago. Marvellous things He did and transformed in me. 

I know the road ahead could be a little bit stormy and windy. I know with all the doubts and uncertainties I may fall but I choose to live with Him and for Him. I believe that everything that I've learnt here , it will be enough for me to move forward for the next chapter. A friend of mine wrote this to me, 'I will let you go because I know God has in-stored so much more for you, for your journey ahead.'

There you go, I am leaving this place with the heart of gratefulness and joy because of my God who is ever faithful and my friends that never stop encouraging and draw me close to our God each day. :) I know that even in times of trouble in the future, I will look back, looking at this chapter and reminisce the works and love my Father had done and shown through the people around me and will preserve and finish strong with my eyes set upon Him and continue establishing His kingdom with actions of love.

With this, see you again people! It's never goodbye! Thank you so much for even in every little things you have done.


Your love, LORD, reaches to the heavens, your faithfulness to the skies.

(Psalm 36:5)

Labels: adventure, beautiful, blessed. graduation, friendship, God, kawan sejati, university


Leaving.

POSTED ON: 21 June 2013 @ 12:20 AM | 0 comments

Leaving everything behind is never easy. Separation from the ones you love is not easy. Life will be different indeed. But here is to everything we ever did and done. *lift up my cup of plain water*...For all the craziness, laughter , jokes , lameness...all the memories we created. Just want to tell you , that you are loved even after this. Life in university would never be the same without you. Thank you for always always always always... loving me for who I am! :')

''Leaving everything behind is never easy, but leaving knowing you are loved and valued by the people who went through everything with you, is indeed something you take with and KEEP in your whole life. :')''









Labels: birthday, blessed. graduation, friendship, God, kawan sejati, random, university


A reason.

POSTED ON: 16 June 2013 @ 5:53 PM | 1 comments

I think in life, when we cannot stand someone or we were irritated by someone...naturally our human mind will lashes out all the negative thoughts about the person. For example, 'Why couldn't he/she be more mature? Things are simple isn't it? ; 'Why does he/she has to be so mean to me?' ; 'What makes he/her hates me or treat me like this?' ; ' Why did I do to deserve such a treatment?'; 'Why he/she has to act out like that?' ...and the list goes on and on. 

It is true that it is harder to be a bigger person in this situation and it is easier to respond and lashes out anger to these people who really needs a spank on their face. But for there are so many reasons to not love/dislike/hate them, can we find at least a reason to LOVE them unconditionally? Just a reason will do...

'Just find a reason to love despite many reasons to not.'

I know it is really really really difficult to choose to see things from the other side but just because someone do not deserve to be loved but that doesn't mean they shouldn't be loved. Come to think of it, all of us do not deserve His Love. But that doesn't mean God don't want to love us. 

In this world of chaos, in the world of cold-hearted people, in this world where true love seem impossible to exist ; Hold on to the reason why you love which is because..... God loves everyone. Shift your perspective to another side where understanding and actions are needed to melt the heart of the people and point them to who and where True Love is . Might be hard along the way, but as long as God is smiling and delighted because you are loving His people..it is worth it. Well, at least you are sowing to please the Spirit and from the Spirit will reap eternal life. (in ref Gal 6:8)

God is love. Therefore love. Without distinction, without calculation, without procrastination, love.  (Henry Drummond)
Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret--it leads only to evil.  For evil men will be cut off, but those who hope in the LORD will inherit the land. (Psalm 37:8-9)

In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. (1 John 4:9-11)


Labels: friendship, God, journey, life, love, thought, Word of God


WIll you?

POSTED ON: 14 June 2013 @ 12:39 AM | 1 comments



My sister ranted at me and said that I have too much of high standards for the man that I am gonna be married and said to me that ' You are not gonna be married if you keep your standard that high!'. I am like, ' I dont think my standards are high,you see.'I just want a man who loves me as much as God loves me and spiritually higher so that he can lead me and to be mold. I don't mind what his look or what he wears, neither where he came from { although I go ga-ga over Ang Mo (Whites) } because what I really want is a man who loves God , who sees God in me, want the best for me and also would willing to die for me just like how Christ died for me. 

At the end of the day, beauty fades, health deteriorates, illness might strikes us..but would the man that marries you hold your old ageing hands ,be there for you and comfort you till the day you die or he dies?


Labels: God, life, random


W.R.I.T.E

POSTED ON: 12 June 2013 @ 3:56 PM | 0 comments

The weather was too good. So I wanted to write in my journal. I was writing and writing and I realised how beautiful is writing especially to your love ones. For me, I write to God in my journal with black ink pen ( because I like cursive handwritings) and I read it again when I am bored or discouraged by circumstances around me. And because it was written to God, it was real and nothing was hideous.

So I was thinking about the whole concept of writing to God. Then I remembered the Bible, the only existing evidence of written Word from God. Then, I remembered watching ' The Day after Tomorrow', where this man tried to save Bible because he said 'This is the oldest book in the world and I want to save it.' I am not sure if he died at the end of the movie or what was his intention of saving the Bible but imagine when the whole world collapses, would you rather risk your life to save the Word of God or you would just save your life so that you can live?

It amazes me how the Word of God still real and relevant to these days. It is God-breathed and it speaks to us. I mean it was written thousand of years before and it is still relevant till today. WOW! Marvellous isn't it? I guess sins never change (Maybe the form of sin changes due to the access of technology and materials we have now). But what happened in the past is still pretty much relevant today. God knows and that is why He provides us Bible to speak to us and guide us .And for those unsung heroes and the authors of the Books that write, copy and preserve the Bible ,I am just amazed by their dedication to serve and write. 

Writing is a gift. And gifts are supposed to be used for God; for goodness and His glory. If you can write, write to God ; tell Him how is your days, praise Him..etc. If you can write, write to encourage one another. If you can write, write to influence people around you or people who read your writings. Who knows what they can take away from your writings?? Use your gift well. :)

“The Spirit and the Word must be combined. If I look to the Spirit alone without the Word, I lay myself open to great delusions also. If the Holy Ghost guides us at all, He will do it according to the Scriptures and never contrary to them.” George Mueller

'You can make anything by writing.' CS Lewis

Labels: beautiful, God, hope, random, thought, Word of God, writing


Hands.

POSTED ON: 02 June 2013 @ 10:10 PM | 0 comments

I went to Prayer at P.E.N.H.O.P (Penang House of Prayer) last Friday. It had been one year since I went there. The last time I went was during my first year? Haha. I couldn't really remember.

We were worshiping God and was singing . Then I was looking at the palm of my hands. And maybe because of the light, my hands were clear and smooth. I am not saying that my hands are beautiful. It just that, that very pair hands are not that beautiful. It was dirty. It stole, touched, slapped , punch and it sinned. It went on to do the things I hated most about myself. 

But at the same time, I was just amazed that the very same hands, God wants to hold it. He wants to hold it and bring the person with that hands to greater height. At that time, I was thinking, 'God must have loved so much that He wants to hold these dirty hands. And perhaps when He was looking at it , He saw how dirty were those hands but willing to wipe the dirt away. He didn't cut the hands away but He wanted to clean it.' I am still imperfect to this days and I will continue to do things that maybe unpleasant to Him but I know my Father will not stop loving me because of these imperfections. And because of this Love, I will choose to do what is pleasing to Him, to do what is right for Him, to love who He loves and to forgive because He forgives. 

God cares about you and choose not to care how dirty your hands are because He loves you instead. His love and grace is so perfect that it overcome your imperfections.The question is, 'Are you willing to let the dirt on your palm of your hands to be cleaned by Him?'



Titus 3:3-7: For we ourselves were also once foolish, disobedient, deceived, serving various lusts and pleasures, living in malice and envy, hateful and hating one another. But when the kindness and the love of God our Savior toward man appeared, not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy He saved us, through the washing of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Spirit, whom He poured out on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Savior, that having been justified by His grace we should become heirs according to the hope of eternal life.

Labels: beautiful, faithfulness, God, hope, life, love, prayer


University.

POSTED ON: @ 9:31 PM | 0 comments

One more month left before the closing for this very chapter that I would remembered for the rest of my life. In this chapter, I realised and know God more personal than ever and being equipped so many lessons and values that I couldn't even expressed. For His unfailing love, that enabled me to be changed and transformed. Looking back, I was this girl who need to be taken out from her broken place, to be healed and to be drawn closer to Him. Looking at it now, I am really delighted that I decided to follow Him. I am on the way to be the person He wants to be. To be mold and shaped. :)

 In this chapter itself, I met beautiful people who loves me despite anything , who wants to carry me forward in their life. So much for this three years. I could't even imagine my life without this people that coloured my life. I am really thankful for you, yes you  ( I know who reads my blog) who are reading this for you have been in my life, to even show me loves and advice through your actions and words. 

 Brothers and sisters, though our path crossed may stopped here but I will earnestly look forward for the day we will be celebrating in heaven. But at the mean time, live your life for Him. :)

Labels: beautiful, blessed. graduation, faith, faithfulness, God, love, university


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When Life is Not the Way It Seems to Be.

POSTED ON: 26 January 2014 @ 3:30 PM | 0 comments

Because life is not the way I wanted,
Because I am lost,
Because I feel like a loser,
I went away.

I went away,
Finding my own strength,
Seeking my own directions,
Trusting in my own choices.

Trusting myself,
Trusting everything else,
Except the One who created me,
The One who loved and is still loving me.

The One who whispered,
'Come to me',
'Come, don't harden your heart.'
'Come to me, my precious.'

'Come!'
But, time and time again,
I trusted myself,
I went away,
Because life is not the way I wanted.


And I stopped. 		Because life is not the way I wanted,
Because I am lost,
Because I feel like a loser,
I come again.

I come again,
Finding Your strength,
Seeking Your will,
Trusting in You.

Trusting in You,
And not everything else,
Only You, the One who created me,
The One who loved and is still loving me.

The One who never stop loving,
Waiting, correcting
Molding, rebuking,
I am indeed Your precious.

Because I am Your Precious,
This time, 
Trusting in You,
I come again
Because I would never even found a LIFE without You.

And I come.



Labels: family, God, journey, life, personal, tough


Back.

POSTED ON: 05 November 2013 @ 9:32 PM | 0 comments

Guess where did I come back from???? I just came back from Universiti Malaya's Persaudaraan Kristian Varsiti camp! 

 I know it was really weird that I joined a camp not being a student there but I believe God works in very unique way.

 Clement asked, ' What makes you join our camp?'
I replied, ' I guess God has to pull me back to where I grow the most (university) to retell me that He is the author and perfecter of faith. That He will know how I feel and that I don't have to run away from Him. 

**(Not exactly the exact things I said to Clem, there are rephrasing)

It is good to take a break from all of the things that hinder me from getting to a greater height with God. Now I am refreshed, it is time to minister and serve in where I am now with all my heart to the Lord,

Because I am reminded...

1st Corinthians 15: 8
Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.

Labels: camp, God, journey, life, refresh


Letter from Patrick!

POSTED ON: @ 9:02 PM | 0 comments

Just when things got a little bit silent and I received this!


I am always amazed by how people can think of us once in a blue moon. I am really happy that I was thought of. And I am glad I was 'RUNNING' in their mind. Haha!

Tien Hui, 
Thank you so much for you timely note. Thank you for noticing it. Thank you for being there. Three years had passed but I can still feel the love and care. I am so grateful for you and this note. Thank you for wanting to pray for me! Allow me to do the same to you! :)

MISS YOU A BUNCH PATRICK!!!!! And u are forever a Patrick for me. I think that suits you more than Miss Brilliant?! Haha!! Coz Patrick is a loyal friend! :)

I really pray that YOU will finish this chapter of yours looking unto HIM and impacting  lives that will go long long ways! But first and foremost, ENJOY!!! weeeee!!!! 

Labels: friendship, God, good, timely, university


Same!

POSTED ON: 16 October 2013 @ 9:32 AM | 0 comments

Different chapter but SAME, CONSTANT GOD!





Labels: adventure, beautiful, blessed, faith, God, happy, thought


Work.

POSTED ON: 09 October 2013 @ 8:29 PM | 1 comments

''Work''

Sometimes, I stopped and think..'Is this what you want to do for the rest of your life...work?' ; 'Do you find pleasure in working?'I can answer a definite 'NO!' for the first question and clueless about the second answer! Sometimes I struggled with 'Is this what you really want to do?'I don't know how people can make it. How older workers work the whole time in their life and manage their time. I am so much younger and sometimes I am just so exhausted. 

I think I just want to find meanings in the things I do in my life. I know the source of the meaning is God. And I know the road of being a teacher itself is not easy. So much to learn to be a dedicated teacher .

'One step at a time.'

Also, it had been a little hard to keep in touch with friends but please note that you all are always in my hearts. You don't know how many times I read those letters/notes you gave. You don't know how many times I scrolled Facebook pictures to see us. 

But, I just gotta move on. Told myself I needed six month..so it's till March to be in some 'dreamy' moods. I also find that life is not stagnant. Meeting new people and moving to another place are always parts of life that constantly reminds us to live to the fullest in our present and do our best for the Lord and the people around us in that point of our lives.


And no matter, I still got Jesus with me. :)

Labels: blessed, God, personal, thoughts


I want to teach...

POSTED ON: 28 September 2013 @ 9:46 PM | 1 comments



I want to teach...

Not because it is the easiest job,
Not because I want to earn easy bucks,
Not because 'Those that cannot make it, they teach.'
Not because I can shout at students,
And feel powerful when they listen to me.

I want to teach...

Because I want to make differences in my students,
Emotionally and physically,
Because I want to tell them , 'You can do it!'
Because I want to believe that each one of them can be molded,
And gives hopes when things seems hopeless.

I want to teach...

Not because teaching is fun,
It is not because sometimes it can wear me down,
Emotionally and physically,
But because these children,
They are teaching me lessons too,
And believe that God is teaching me through them.

And because of all these,  I will continue to learn and teach.





Labels: God, personal, school, teach, thought


EVERYTHING I ever needed.

POSTED ON: 15 September 2013 @ 9:53 PM | 0 comments

I've had many tears and sorrows,
I've had questions for tomorrow,
there's been times I didn't know right from wrong.
But in every situation,
God gave me blessed consulation,
that my trials come to only make me strong.

I've been to lots of places,
I've seen a lot of faces,
there's been times I felt so all alone.
But in my lonely hours,
yes, those precious lonely hours,
Jesus lets me know that I was His own

I thank God for the mountains,
and I thank Him for the valleys,
I thank Him for the storms He brought me through.
For if I'd never had a problem,
I wouldn't know God could solve them,
I'd never know what faith in God could do

Through it all,
through it all,
I've learned to trust in Jesus,
I've learned to trust in God.

Through it all,
through it all,
I've learned to depend upon His Word.

Who am I that He wants to stay beside me when I cry? Who am I that He is willing to hear the complains that I made? Who am I that He decided to love? Who am I that He willing to wash my ugliness with His Beauty and Blood? Who am I that He cares ? Who am I ?

And yet, He chose to clothe me with everything that I needed ; EVERYTHING I ever needed.








Labels: beautiful, bless, blessed, Daddy, God


Giver.

POSTED ON: 11 September 2013 @ 11:27 PM | 0 comments

As I was praying with the sisters in church, I was really convicted by this word, 'Giver'. I think I am blinded by the money that I am earning. I think that the salary I am earning , it is not enough. Therefore, I am giving tuition to students from my school. I was given two students. And I wanted more. I think 'money' eventually blinded me in the process of having more. And  with the assumed sum of money that I am going to earn, I started to plan what I want to achieve in this one year. I can tell you the plans that I have, it is so self-oriented. For example, going to New Zealand for work and travel.

 I did not ask God about this. I just decided that I wanna save up for it. Because I just want to do it. And now I have two students that I am going to give tuition to and it gonna take up Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. And I am already foresee weariness. Somehow promise is a promise. 

  I ask myself sometimes, 'Why are you doing this, Fong Wan?Why?' I can tell you honestly that I am doing all of these not for family, not for people around me... but for me. Then today, I realised I became selfish! So selfish and so self-oriented , I forgot and lost my identity as a daughter of Christ that gives. And I couldn't recognise the giver I used to be.

 But today I am reminded again the ultimate reason I came back to this place is to give, to minister to my mother, brother, sister and people around me. And also to see God and witness His goodness in times of difficulties. In camp, I drew God was walking with me along the hills, up and down. Now I understand why I drew that. Because life is not easy but God promised He would walk with me.

 I don't want to give out of convenience but I wanna be a greater giver that give in times of inconvenience because that would mean so much more, with Him and for Him.
Because my Jesus gave and still giving, I am giving too! 



Labels: beautiful, family, God, home, personal


Doing what you do.

POSTED ON: 01 September 2013 @ 8:54 PM | 0 comments

What is your passion?

What are the things you believe in?

Go all out and live for the passion and everything you believe in.Because these two things are going to push you whenever you feel like a failure. There are reasons why you are living the way you living. Believe me when I said, ' You are what you made because of your choices.'. For me , it's...

Jesus.
Grace, Love, Mercy.

Labels: God, random, thoughts


A Job!

POSTED ON: 30 August 2013 @ 11:00 PM | 0 comments

Found a job!! It is a teaching post! I am going to teach primary students. I am happy!! I know that I am going to get this job actually because I believe God will provide. 

 Nevertheless, I talked to my mother about the amount of money I have to give to her monthly. When she told me about the amount, I told her that I cannot give that much because I just couldn't. But I know that deep inside my heart, I put myself above my family. I know I was being selfish. 

 I was talking to an auntie in the church, she told me that I have to give my mother no matter what because we have to honour our parents. It strikes me how I always put myself first rather that God (as to not follow His ways by honouring parents)and also family. I also came across this picture in Facebook quoting, 'Sometimes you think your parents couldn't give you the things you want but no knowing they gave you everything they have.' 

 So many times, I really envy of others who can do whatever they want but never did I thought that my mother gave everything she can have in her life to give me a better life. All I do is compare and blame. I must have disappointed her with my selfish thinking and actions. But I am also grateful that I know this right now. 

 Even with the money that I am earning now, it can never be enough but I would love to use it to glorify God and exhibit God's love towards my family. If I cannot part with the money I am earning, I don't think I can be a good testimony to my family. As I was struggling with this too, a thought came to me when I was talking to my mother...'She is aged, she might go one day...the money you are earning.. give her WHILE YOU CAN.'

 I , myself experienced first-hand the pain and regret of losing the love one. I am not going to feel the same for the thing that I can do but not. And I am just going to really really really depend on God..on Him..for this season. Because He knows and understands. :')

1st John 3 :16-18 This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters.If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person? Dear children,let us not love with words or speech but with ACTIONS and in TRUTH.



Labels: family, God, home, learnt, lesson, life, melaka, quote


Because of Ah Phang!

POSTED ON: 04 August 2013 @ 5:36 PM | 0 comments

It is Sunday again. But today, PKA's new batch Excos are here to do Committee Retreat Planning (CPR). It always really really nice to see these faces of darlings in the church. But even with that short meet-up, I am already so delighted but also with a little bit swollen heart inside of me.

Then, I also received this gift from a friend of mine in Penang. I cried. Why? Because when I read the card, I am feeling exactly what she is feeling. I miss her . I miss people whom I 'sayang' in USM. I think when I came back to this home of mine, I came back with 'compare mindset' Even with family, I was thinking, 'My friends in Penang would do this, why can't them?'

I cannot deny it will take a little bit more time to let go of the previous chapter that God had blessed me with. I am gonna miss the people that I used to be with so much.So so much. Sometimes my tears fell itself when I thought of it, without realising. But I am not going to allow all of these to hinder His works in my life in Melaka. I am gonna embrace these emotions but will work together hand-in-hand with grace with my Father.

It will take time but My Father is here with me. :') 

Dear Ah Phang, I miss you. :') You know I actually cried when I read that. Thank you for your continuous encouragement and love even though we are far apart. Never knew why I deserve a friend like you till now. I will always bring Donkey wherever I go to remember God's goodness in my life because He gave me friend like you. I may not see you that often anymore which actually secretly sadden me, but I will try my best okay? I really cant wait to see you again in September. Arr, I am tearing again. But you know how much you meant to me. Even though we are far apart , but you are always CLOSE to my heart. Distance is not a problem when we have the heart , love and effort. :) Me sayang YOU a lot. :')

Helllow Donkey P!!


Thank you Ah Phang!







These are my reactions when I got the Donkey!

This is for YOU, AH PHANG!
Spongebob Drawing FOR YOU!

And once again, I am thankful for all the things You have done, my Lord.


Before the world began
You were on His mind
And every tear you cry
Is precious in His eyes
Because of His great love
He gave His only Son
Everything was done
So you would come

Nothing you can do
Could make Him love you more
And nothing that you've done
Could make Him close the door
Because of His great love
He gave His only Son
Everything was done
So you would come

Come to the Father
Though your gift is small
Broken hearts, broken lives
He will take them all
The power of the Word
The power of His blood
Everything was done
So you would come

I will never understand how wide, deep and great is Your love for me. But I am thankful for everything EVERYTHING You have done for me in the past, the blessings You poured unto me, My Lord.. Because of what You did, I am able to stand before you and have a personal relationship with you. Thank you for taking in all unpleasing character of mine and wanting to mold me even though I am unworthy. Thank you for loving me, for a wretch like me. Thank you for dying for me. :')






Labels: bestfriend, blessed, friendship, God, journey, love, personal, sister


I am Home.

POSTED ON: 28 July 2013 @ 7:39 PM | 1 comments

It had been a week since I came back from Cameron Camp. When people asked me whether I have this post-cameron-camp-syndrome, I told them, 'Yeahhh..but I am also having more of this post-graduation-from-USM-syndrome'. Honestly, I miss everything about PENANG, USM and everyone who is going to be there in September. Sometimes , I wish September would come a little bit faster so that I can see familiar faces again. Because of that, I did not feel that I am home.

 I know the ministry at home is not going to be easy. But I love what Mother Teresa said that 'We can do no great things only small things with great love.' It reminded me on how little things that were done out of love that really matter to God than doing big great things out of own desires. Maybe just washing plates, sweeping floor, listening to sister, listening to brother, accompanying my mother to watch television...just being there to help as much as I can... in little things,out of love that matters.

 It was hard at first when I came back especially the first few days in Melaka. I wanted to run, to go to somewhere where I can do what I want, to have the freedom to be who I want to be..but I know deep inside of me, I was being very selfish just by thinking of that. How can I leave my family behind and not be there for them after what I've learnt of Him in the past three years? How can I know God by myself and not share Him and demonstrate Him with my loves one?

 My family needs love, not the normal love...but my Father's perfect love. And I know...I know now God is here with me..in this family of mine. Yes, right now, this house! God loves this family too. And I know it is not going to be easy. But I am not giving up. I am not giving up serving this family because I know God is not giving up as well. 

 So finally after some days of re-adapting here, I just want to say..'I am home.' And I am glad I am home.I know this journey can be a little bit shaky ahead, but I will stand firm with Christ as the foundation. Because God so loved my mother, brother and sister too that He ALSO gave up His only begotten son to die for them. With that, I will try my best but also reminded to let God to do the rest. So yeah... I am home, people!
1st Corinthians 15:58 : Therefore my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labour in the Lord is not in vain.

1st Corinthians 16: 13-14: Be on your guard, stand firm in faith, be men of courage; be strong. Do everything in love.

Labels: blessed, family, Father's love, firm, God, home, thoughts


Give me Life in Thy Ways.

POSTED ON: 23 July 2013 @ 3:09 PM | 1 comments

I am back from Cameron Camp 2013. Couldn't believe that I endured three weeks of cold weather. It was really really really a good experience to deal with obstacles in life. I came in to Cameron Camp , wanted to be equipped with God's Word. But well, I guess Daddy got another plan for me. He wanted to me to be ME!

 Weird huh? I guess when I accepted Jesus Christ as my saviour..I forgot that He wanted to love me for who I am. Never did I know that all He want is to ACCEPT ME for who I really am. All I look forward is to please Him with the best that I can and neglecting my weaknesses and do not embrace the fact that I am FONG WAN, the one who also know life hurts.

 Because of the obstacles of life which made me stronger but it also resulted me to ignore things that allow me to appear 'weak' to others. Because of that, I never wanted to share during my first week in camp. But I learnt to share to the Lord whom love me for who I am even though it was really difficult. Because I know deep inside of me, it was worth it.

 After attending camp, indeed one of the crucial answers were answered. I remembered asking God, 'I am willing to give up everything for you, even to go to the end of earth for you...why are you not sending me?' But now I know it is because I never know how to be a daughter to serve Him, but rather a servant that want to serve Him with all my strengths forgetting to embrace my weaknesses too.

 And that was the most important thing I have learnt in Cameron Camp. I know in me, I am not strong enough to endure this life with so many obstacles that going to tear me down, but I am going to stand firm in  my Daddy who is going to cry, walk , smile, sit and comfort me whenever I know I cannot do it.

 Funny how God always have another way to awaken you from your mistakes. But well, He is after-all the Creator and knew me while I was in mommy's womb...Thank you, Dad! Thank you for wanting to love me and showing me grace despite knowing I will fail you. :'))))))











Labels: blessed, cameron, camp, Daddy, God, personal


Thank you. :)

POSTED ON: 27 June 2013 @ 11:06 PM | 0 comments

''Packing is a little bit different this time; I am packing memories as well.''

I know this day will arrive. This day where this university life will come to an end. I still remember my mother sent me to this island and I cried when she went back alone and was grateful she made a trip here. I cried to her telling her that I have no friend. I cried because I was alone. How time flies.

Today, I know if I cry...I cry of joy because my God supplies all the needs that He knows I need in this university---- He gave me everything that made this university chapter such a worthwhile chapter. How I have grown towards Him, how I have grown to love people around me...this things I will never never never see myself as, three years ago. Marvellous things He did and transformed in me. 

I know the road ahead could be a little bit stormy and windy. I know with all the doubts and uncertainties I may fall but I choose to live with Him and for Him. I believe that everything that I've learnt here , it will be enough for me to move forward for the next chapter. A friend of mine wrote this to me, 'I will let you go because I know God has in-stored so much more for you, for your journey ahead.'

There you go, I am leaving this place with the heart of gratefulness and joy because of my God who is ever faithful and my friends that never stop encouraging and draw me close to our God each day. :) I know that even in times of trouble in the future, I will look back, looking at this chapter and reminisce the works and love my Father had done and shown through the people around me and will preserve and finish strong with my eyes set upon Him and continue establishing His kingdom with actions of love.

With this, see you again people! It's never goodbye! Thank you so much for even in every little things you have done.


Your love, LORD, reaches to the heavens, your faithfulness to the skies.

(Psalm 36:5)

Labels: adventure, beautiful, blessed. graduation, friendship, God, kawan sejati, university


Leaving.

POSTED ON: 21 June 2013 @ 12:20 AM | 0 comments

Leaving everything behind is never easy. Separation from the ones you love is not easy. Life will be different indeed. But here is to everything we ever did and done. *lift up my cup of plain water*...For all the craziness, laughter , jokes , lameness...all the memories we created. Just want to tell you , that you are loved even after this. Life in university would never be the same without you. Thank you for always always always always... loving me for who I am! :')

''Leaving everything behind is never easy, but leaving knowing you are loved and valued by the people who went through everything with you, is indeed something you take with and KEEP in your whole life. :')''









Labels: birthday, blessed. graduation, friendship, God, kawan sejati, random, university


A reason.

POSTED ON: 16 June 2013 @ 5:53 PM | 1 comments

I think in life, when we cannot stand someone or we were irritated by someone...naturally our human mind will lashes out all the negative thoughts about the person. For example, 'Why couldn't he/she be more mature? Things are simple isn't it? ; 'Why does he/she has to be so mean to me?' ; 'What makes he/her hates me or treat me like this?' ; ' Why did I do to deserve such a treatment?'; 'Why he/she has to act out like that?' ...and the list goes on and on. 

It is true that it is harder to be a bigger person in this situation and it is easier to respond and lashes out anger to these people who really needs a spank on their face. But for there are so many reasons to not love/dislike/hate them, can we find at least a reason to LOVE them unconditionally? Just a reason will do...

'Just find a reason to love despite many reasons to not.'

I know it is really really really difficult to choose to see things from the other side but just because someone do not deserve to be loved but that doesn't mean they shouldn't be loved. Come to think of it, all of us do not deserve His Love. But that doesn't mean God don't want to love us. 

In this world of chaos, in the world of cold-hearted people, in this world where true love seem impossible to exist ; Hold on to the reason why you love which is because..... God loves everyone. Shift your perspective to another side where understanding and actions are needed to melt the heart of the people and point them to who and where True Love is . Might be hard along the way, but as long as God is smiling and delighted because you are loving His people..it is worth it. Well, at least you are sowing to please the Spirit and from the Spirit will reap eternal life. (in ref Gal 6:8)

God is love. Therefore love. Without distinction, without calculation, without procrastination, love.  (Henry Drummond)
Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret--it leads only to evil.  For evil men will be cut off, but those who hope in the LORD will inherit the land. (Psalm 37:8-9)

In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. (1 John 4:9-11)


Labels: friendship, God, journey, life, love, thought, Word of God


WIll you?

POSTED ON: 14 June 2013 @ 12:39 AM | 1 comments



My sister ranted at me and said that I have too much of high standards for the man that I am gonna be married and said to me that ' You are not gonna be married if you keep your standard that high!'. I am like, ' I dont think my standards are high,you see.'I just want a man who loves me as much as God loves me and spiritually higher so that he can lead me and to be mold. I don't mind what his look or what he wears, neither where he came from { although I go ga-ga over Ang Mo (Whites) } because what I really want is a man who loves God , who sees God in me, want the best for me and also would willing to die for me just like how Christ died for me. 

At the end of the day, beauty fades, health deteriorates, illness might strikes us..but would the man that marries you hold your old ageing hands ,be there for you and comfort you till the day you die or he dies?


Labels: God, life, random


W.R.I.T.E

POSTED ON: 12 June 2013 @ 3:56 PM | 0 comments

The weather was too good. So I wanted to write in my journal. I was writing and writing and I realised how beautiful is writing especially to your love ones. For me, I write to God in my journal with black ink pen ( because I like cursive handwritings) and I read it again when I am bored or discouraged by circumstances around me. And because it was written to God, it was real and nothing was hideous.

So I was thinking about the whole concept of writing to God. Then I remembered the Bible, the only existing evidence of written Word from God. Then, I remembered watching ' The Day after Tomorrow', where this man tried to save Bible because he said 'This is the oldest book in the world and I want to save it.' I am not sure if he died at the end of the movie or what was his intention of saving the Bible but imagine when the whole world collapses, would you rather risk your life to save the Word of God or you would just save your life so that you can live?

It amazes me how the Word of God still real and relevant to these days. It is God-breathed and it speaks to us. I mean it was written thousand of years before and it is still relevant till today. WOW! Marvellous isn't it? I guess sins never change (Maybe the form of sin changes due to the access of technology and materials we have now). But what happened in the past is still pretty much relevant today. God knows and that is why He provides us Bible to speak to us and guide us .And for those unsung heroes and the authors of the Books that write, copy and preserve the Bible ,I am just amazed by their dedication to serve and write. 

Writing is a gift. And gifts are supposed to be used for God; for goodness and His glory. If you can write, write to God ; tell Him how is your days, praise Him..etc. If you can write, write to encourage one another. If you can write, write to influence people around you or people who read your writings. Who knows what they can take away from your writings?? Use your gift well. :)

“The Spirit and the Word must be combined. If I look to the Spirit alone without the Word, I lay myself open to great delusions also. If the Holy Ghost guides us at all, He will do it according to the Scriptures and never contrary to them.” George Mueller

'You can make anything by writing.' CS Lewis

Labels: beautiful, God, hope, random, thought, Word of God, writing


Hands.

POSTED ON: 02 June 2013 @ 10:10 PM | 0 comments

I went to Prayer at P.E.N.H.O.P (Penang House of Prayer) last Friday. It had been one year since I went there. The last time I went was during my first year? Haha. I couldn't really remember.

We were worshiping God and was singing . Then I was looking at the palm of my hands. And maybe because of the light, my hands were clear and smooth. I am not saying that my hands are beautiful. It just that, that very pair hands are not that beautiful. It was dirty. It stole, touched, slapped , punch and it sinned. It went on to do the things I hated most about myself. 

But at the same time, I was just amazed that the very same hands, God wants to hold it. He wants to hold it and bring the person with that hands to greater height. At that time, I was thinking, 'God must have loved so much that He wants to hold these dirty hands. And perhaps when He was looking at it , He saw how dirty were those hands but willing to wipe the dirt away. He didn't cut the hands away but He wanted to clean it.' I am still imperfect to this days and I will continue to do things that maybe unpleasant to Him but I know my Father will not stop loving me because of these imperfections. And because of this Love, I will choose to do what is pleasing to Him, to do what is right for Him, to love who He loves and to forgive because He forgives. 

God cares about you and choose not to care how dirty your hands are because He loves you instead. His love and grace is so perfect that it overcome your imperfections.The question is, 'Are you willing to let the dirt on your palm of your hands to be cleaned by Him?'



Titus 3:3-7: For we ourselves were also once foolish, disobedient, deceived, serving various lusts and pleasures, living in malice and envy, hateful and hating one another. But when the kindness and the love of God our Savior toward man appeared, not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy He saved us, through the washing of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Spirit, whom He poured out on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Savior, that having been justified by His grace we should become heirs according to the hope of eternal life.

Labels: beautiful, faithfulness, God, hope, life, love, prayer


University.

POSTED ON: @ 9:31 PM | 0 comments

One more month left before the closing for this very chapter that I would remembered for the rest of my life. In this chapter, I realised and know God more personal than ever and being equipped so many lessons and values that I couldn't even expressed. For His unfailing love, that enabled me to be changed and transformed. Looking back, I was this girl who need to be taken out from her broken place, to be healed and to be drawn closer to Him. Looking at it now, I am really delighted that I decided to follow Him. I am on the way to be the person He wants to be. To be mold and shaped. :)

 In this chapter itself, I met beautiful people who loves me despite anything , who wants to carry me forward in their life. So much for this three years. I could't even imagine my life without this people that coloured my life. I am really thankful for you, yes you  ( I know who reads my blog) who are reading this for you have been in my life, to even show me loves and advice through your actions and words. 

 Brothers and sisters, though our path crossed may stopped here but I will earnestly look forward for the day we will be celebrating in heaven. But at the mean time, live your life for Him. :)

Labels: beautiful, blessed. graduation, faith, faithfulness, God, love, university


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